The "Primate " Defence.

The "Primate " Defence.
20-06-2007

My wife is forever having a go at me for sitting in front of the T.V. of an evening and , as she rather unkindly puts it, "eating continuously".

I reckon it's my right to have an occasional snack, but I never know how to defend myself, until the other night, when I had an inspiration and told her it's because I am a primate.

I pointed out that, unlike carnivores who only eat occasionally, us primates are designed to nibble almost continuously when we are not sleeping.
In the case of monkeys it might be some wild figs , caterpillars or birds eggs, whereas in my case it's chocolate biscuits or packets of crisps.

She listened to my explanation, but I don't think she bought it......

20-06-2007

Being the only primate with what we ourselves consider "higher intelligence" we should also be the only one capable of rationally refraining our instincts.

That's probably not what you wanted to hear tho is it

27-10-2007

The fat and nutritional content of biscuits and crisps is a little bit different from that of wild figs and birds eggs. Maybe you should get yourself some monkey pellets for those long nights in.....or mabye you could fill a log with marmoset gum....then you wouldn't even get bored. Also, you could get your wife to 'scatter feed' the biscuits around the house, making you work for your food as you would do in the wild.

27-10-2007

A bit of "habitat enrichment" to stop me getting bored, eh?

Maybe even a new mate or two!

28-10-2007

If I had someone to tell me to get up off the sofa and stop eating maybe I'd lose some weight so I'm sure its not a bad thing.

06-11-2007

She tells me I'm a bit of an animal at times,too.

(I won't go into details.....)