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Movie review rant

Discussion in 'Zoo Cafe' started by nanoboy, 19 Jun 2012.

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  1. nanoboy

    nanoboy Well-Known Member

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    I saw this over the weekend and I am still confused. :confused:

    The movie appears to be set during one of the later Bourne movies (probably Ultimatum) as they kept referencing Jason Bourne (while showing a photo of Matt Damon). It is not a prequel due to the timeline and the loose association with Treadstone: I would call it a spin-off.

    However, you don't have a snowball's chance in hell of following the storyline if you did not see all the other Bourne films. Even if you did see them all, you will need to have your companion notes handy to reference the litany of old characters, plus all the ominous sounding project names like 'Treadstone', 'Blackbriar', 'Outcome', and 'LARX'.

    The story was a mess. The action sequences were few and far between, and when you did wake up, all you got was a car chase. The action paled in comparison to Bourne's hand-to-hand combat scenes, or the nailbiting scene in the London train station.

    As a Bourne fanboy, I found this movie to be highly disappointing because of the lack of action scenes, the story's snail pace, and the totally confusing plotline.

    Don't waste your time with this one.

    Rating: 5/10 (where the last Bourne movie was easily an 8)
     
  2. nanoboy

    nanoboy Well-Known Member

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    The Watch

    I quite like Ben Stiller, Vince Vaugh, and Jonah Hill. It seemed logical that I would like this movie three times as much as a movie with each on his own. Not surprisingly, I was three times as disappointed, and wanted three hours of my life back.

    There are a few funny scenes but by and large, this film fell flat on its face. I know it's a comedy, but there were so many inconsistencies and plot holes that it makes you wonder if the writers/directors watched the movie at all before giving the green light for it to be released.

    Folks, this movie was not 'The Heartbreak Kid' meets 'Wedding Crashers' meets 'Superbad': it was just plain, unadulterated crap.

    There are amateur films on YouTube that are funnier than this movie. You've been warned.

    Rating: 5/10 (where the aforementioned movies were 8s)
     
  3. Chlidonias

    Chlidonias Moderator Staff Member 15+ year member

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    that sounds about right. I'd probably rate it a little higher than 5 out of 10 but still nowhere near as good as the Matt Damon movies. Pretty confusing and trying far far too hard to shoe-horn it into the Bourne franchise (all the mentions of Jason Bourne, etc) rather than just making a movie for its own sake.

    What I said about it (way back on page three!): "I'd agree with Hix's comments above. It's alright, not great, not as good as Matt Damon's ones (well, not so much the unnecessary third installment) but still worth watching. Some of the conversations were a bit hard to follow. I think you would have to have seen the Matt Damon movies to really get what was going on, otherwise it would just be confusing. And if Hix hadn't said about Rachel Weisz I wouldn't have recognised her either. Some of the stunts in the motorbike chase were a bit over the top for a Bourne movie I thought.

    Overall, not something you really need to see at the movies. Might as well wait for the DVD and watch it at home."
     
  4. DavidBrown

    DavidBrown Well-Known Member 15+ year member

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    I also thought that "the Sarah Connor Chronicles" was a great television series. That ending with John Connor going back to the future as a kid was not intended as the end of the series. They were anticipating another season that never happened unfortunately, so that was one of those series that ended on a perpetual cliffhanger. The same thing happened with "Twin Peaks" with Dale Cooper getting possessed by the demon BOB.
     
  5. nanoboy

    nanoboy Well-Known Member

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    Well look at that! We agree on a movie being crap. Christmas really is in the air. :p

    David, I don't actually remember the ending. I do remember there was an oriental Aussie who was hot, and that the story got way way confusing towards the end.
     
  6. DavidBrown

    DavidBrown Well-Known Member 15+ year member

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    The Terminator show did get somewhat confusing. The implication was that the Shirley Manson character who was really a shape-shifting Terminator was trying to prevent the construction of Skynet for reasons never really revealed - presumably she (or rather "it") wanted to save humanity for some reason. Her company built a "good" AI system called John Henry which the machines from the future were trying to corrupt and turn into Skynet. At the end of the series the "good" AI, Shirley Manson's terminator, and young John Connor went to the future to try and prevent the machines from winning. John Connor met several characters that 1) didn't recognize who John Connor was and 2) were dead in the present timeline, so the timeline had shifted. Whatever caused the timeline to shift was never revealed.
     
  7. Chlidonias

    Chlidonias Moderator Staff Member 15+ year member

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    I didn't say it was a crap movie. I liked it, it just wasn't as good as the real Bourne movies.
     
  8. nanoboy

    nanoboy Well-Known Member

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    That's more like it. ;)

    David, I think that I need to watch that final episode again.
     
  9. nanoboy

    nanoboy Well-Known Member

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    We saw this last night, and we didn't like it. The time travelling was complicated and was not explained well at all. I do wonder what the point of the movie was, as the action was tame and the story confusing. The child with telekinetic powers remind me of the little girl from the Skrillex video though.
     
  10. Pygathrix

    Pygathrix Well-Known Member 15+ year member

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    I thought Looper was entertaining enough, but there were massive plot holes aplenty. Hix, you benefited from not knowing who Joseph Gordon-Levitt is, because if you knew what he really looked like you would have been unnerved by his prosthetic face which made him look rather peculiar and semi-expressionless. It was supposed to make him resemble a younger Bruce Willis,although I thought he would have passed for a youthful Robert de Niro more convincingly.
     
  11. nanoboy

    nanoboy Well-Known Member

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    Taken 2 was great. As Hix said, if you enjoyed the first instalment, then you'll love this one. Like the first movie, it takes a while to get going, but once it does, th action doesn't stop. I don't recall seeing Hagia Sofia in the movie, which is weird, given that it was the largest church in Christendom for a thousand years and is more impressive than the mosques they kept showing. I love the way that Liam Neeson kills everyone as usual, and has no qualms about shooting a baddie in the back. :D I can't wait for Taken 3.



    {Note from mods - this thread continues here: Movie review rant 2013}
     
    Last edited by a moderator: 31 Dec 2018
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